Tuesday, July 26, 2005!
i got my first blueslip today.
er, what can i say but the feeling is not as exhilarating as i thought it would be. ahaha. maybe coz this time, i was really in pain and not just plotting to get outta school.haha.
my body just wouldnt synchronise with me. dangsit. i really wanted to attend choir today. :(
well, but i wouldnt complain abt the extra rest i got. *winks*
***
school is basically as monotonous as usual...
except during math lection where i suddenly lost control of my volume.
haha. for the clueless, it went like this:
mr chew (lecturer) : what is 1 square class?
-silence-
ruth: (loud n clear) ONE! *oh sheet i just meant to whisper that!!*
-laughter-
oh goodness. i SHOULD stop embarassing myself like that.
at least i paid good attention for the rest of the lecture. :x
***
i really think that i ought to enjoy school more than i am.
as in, i do love NJC, but the exhaustion of it all just seem to overwhelm me.
i shall not let all the stress overwhelm me. i said in my council speech that i love njc and will do my best to serve the school...and i will do it. I WILL DO IT.
*oh pls dont let me regret this the next morning...* haha :)
i shall psycho myself that i am stronger than who i am now. i SHALL BE stronger than who i am now because i am really not proud of the way i am now...being beaten down by sheer exhaustion and all.
i do not deny that i am tired. but maybe i shall not admit that i am tired too. (heh, juxtaposition)
***
as the CTSS fair draws closer, i do feel a little apprehensive about going. well, its more of like i already made up my mind not to go already, but mugmao kept trying to psycho me.
i dunoe. the last speech day left me feeling lost and lonely.
i dont want to go back to those memories again...even more so as they come back to haunt me these days.
sigh. i guess my decision is made.
***
yay!! i did a new layout!! and this time i took an even shorter time!!
haha.
i am so proud of myself!! :)
isnt the girl cute? *winks*
***
gosh, thanks for listening to me rant.
love, Ruth
5:11 AM
_____________________
